18 | Fifteen-Month Age Gap Pros and Cons
Two Under Two Tips
Listen to the Podcast:
Listen on Spotify | Listen on Apple
Or search your favourite podcast app!
I grew up believing that two years was the perfect age gap. My brother is two years older than me, so that’s what felt normal. Anything longer seemed like too much, and anything shorter seemed a little crazy. But after I had my first baby, I was surprised to find that I immediately wanted another one.
That desire led me down a rabbit hole of researching close age gaps, Irish twins, and the pros and cons of having babies close together. I ended up getting pregnant when my daughter was 6 months old, giving us a 15-month age gap between her and my son.
Since then, I’ve had another son with the same 15-month gap. So, I’ve experienced this back-to-back baby stage twice now—and honestly? I’m a big fan.
But I didn’t always feel that way. I remember being pregnant with my second and thinking, What have we done? Are they too close? How am I going to manage this? I had all the fears. And if you’re in that place right now—pregnant with your second child or considering a small age gap—I want to encourage you. It might go better than you think.
Let’s dive into my pros and cons of having kids 15 months apart.
The Cons:
Even though I love our close age gaps, it’s not without its challenges. Here’s what was hard for me.
1. Our Breastfeeding Journey Was Cut Short
I had high hopes of tandem nursing. I did my research and imagined I’d be able to nurse my daughter all through pregnancy and then nurse both babies after my second was born. But that wasn’t our reality. Both times, my babies weaned themselves around 10 months when I was about halfway through my pregnancy.
If I had known that breastfeeding would be cut short, I might have considered waiting to get pregnant again. But honestly, I’m thankful I didn’t know. Because now, I can’t imagine life without my son. And that’s the wild thing about pregnancy—timing is everything. If I had waited even a month, I’d have a completely different child. I’m so grateful for the children God gave me, exactly when He gave them to me.
2. I Didn’t Have Enough Hands
When you have two little ones close in age, it feels like you never have enough arms. My oldest was just learning to walk and follow directions when her brother was born, which meant I often had to carry both kids at once.
For those early months, my double stroller became my best friend. I’d wear one baby and carry the other, or strap them both into the stroller just to make outings manageable. I was nervous to leave the house alone with two kids, but with time (and lots of practice), it got easier.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the thought of taking multiple little ones out, know this—your capacity grows as you need it. It’s okay to take things one step at a time. I started by visiting safe, familiar places where I knew we’d be contained, like friends’ houses or our church group. And little by little, I gained confidence.
3. The Mom Guilt Hit Hard
The transition from one child to two hit me with a wave of mom guilt. It’s hard when your focus is no longer 100% on your firstborn. I felt guilty about being low-energy during pregnancy, guilty that I couldn’t meet both of their needs perfectly, and guilty that their experiences would be different.
But here’s the truth that helped me get through it—giving your child a sibling is one of the best gifts you can give them. Yes, it’s hard at first. Yes, your love feels divided. But love doesn’t divide; it multiplies. And watching my kids become best friends makes all the hard moments worth it.
The Pros:
Now, let’s talk about the good stuff. Having kids 15 months apart came with some unexpected blessings.
1. We Were Already in Baby Mode
When my son was born, it felt surprisingly natural to add another baby to the mix. We were already in the diaper stage, already had the baby gear, and I hadn’t forgotten all the sleep recommendations and car seat rules. It felt like we just slid another baby right into our routine.
2. I Had a Restful First Trimester
My second pregnancy was exhausting, but since my daughter was still young and taking two naps a day, I had time to rest. I could nap during one of her naps and use the other one to get things done. And when she was awake, I’d often barricade her in the living room and read to her while I rested.
If you’re pregnant with a small age gap and feeling overwhelmed, give yourself permission to rest when you can. It makes a big difference!
3. They Entertain Each Other So Well
Now that my kids are older, they are such good friends. They’ve had each other for what feels like their whole lives, and they genuinely enjoy playing together. I thought it would take a year for them to bond, but even when my son was 3-4 months old, my daughter loved making him giggle.
In some ways, having two little ones close together is easier because they entertain each other. Even now with three kids (ages 3, 2, and 9 months), I tell my husband that this stage feels easier than when I just had one baby to entertain all day!
Thoughts That Helped Me Through the Transition
Even though we chose a small age gap, I still had doubts pop up. Here are a few thoughts that gave me peace and helped me prepare for the transition.
1. I’ve never had a 15-month-old before, who can say this isn't the perfect time to have another?
When I got pregnant, my daughter was 6 months old. I had no idea who she would be at 15 months or 2 years old or 3 years old, so how could I know whether it was the “right” time for another baby? Every age gap comes with its own joys and challenges—there’s no reason to believe that wasn't the best time to add a sibling!
2. Everything Is a Phase
Babies change so quickly. The hard moments? They pass. And the sweet moments? They’re gone too quickly. The key to enjoying motherhood is holding on to both of those truths at the same time.
3. I Want a Full Table Someday
When I think about the future, I picture a full table of adult children and grandchildren. I want my kids to have siblings who will always be there for them, long after I’m gone. That perspective helped me let go of the guilt I felt about dividing my attention.
4. It’s Okay to Mourn the Family You’re Leaving Behind
Each time I’ve been pregnant, I’ve felt a sadness about saying goodbye to the version of our family that I loved. It’s okay to grieve that. You’re not a bad mom for feeling sad about the unknown, even while you’re excited about the new life coming. Mourning makes space in your heart for the next chapter.
5. Fertility Is a Gift
My third pregnancy was a surprise, and I had to remind myself that fertility is a gift. We try so hard to control the timing, but ultimately, family planning is in God’s hands. No one's family planning goes exactly how they imagined, so I was so thankful my “struggle” was more kids than I knew how to handle!
Final Encouragement: Don’t Fear God’s Blessings
I think we’re often taught to fear blessings. When I mentioned wanting another baby to a friend after my first was born, she told me it was a bad idea and that I should wait. But I remember telling her, No matter how hard it is, I’m never going to regret it.
And I don’t. I believe with all my heart that we’ll never look at a child in our family and regret bringing them into the world. But we might look back and wonder what would have happened if we hadn’t let fear hold us back.
So if you’re considering another baby—or if you’re already pregnant and feeling overwhelmed—I hopeyou found encouragement here today!
If this post (or episode) blessed you, subscribe to the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen, and please share it with a friend who needs it. Thanks for being here!
